I have to admit, today was not one of my Finest days…I’m going to be very transparent with you all. I almost let my anger get the best of me. We all are not naïve to the fact that everyone’s NOT your true friend. Neither can you trust everybody that comes into your life. But I will never get use to nor not be shaken (alittle), when the backstabbing, lying, and manipulation comes from those in your closest, inner circle. People you thought were your True Blues, Do or Dies, Ace Boon Coons. People that you would have bet on, that they wouldn’t turn their backs on you. Whoo!! It’s makes you wonder, did they ever know your heart? Do they remember all the times you stuck by them and sacrificed unselfishly and without recognition?
With that being said, I was plotting. Telling myself, “If I hear one more thing, I’m going to calculatedly bring them down…with pleasure. And others will say, She didn’t have to Go In So HARD.” I’ve improved, in leaps and bounds, when it comes to my attitude. But this situation was bringing back the Old Me that I thought I had laid to rest. This situation also brought back my old state of mind, I didn’t initiate the conflict, but I will surely finish it with Grandeur.
But GOD…I had to truly pray, before I went off on the deep end and He (God) brought so much Light to this situation and the ones that will come in the future.
The first thing I had to do was truly Forgive. Because I was lying to myself and telling myself, “I already forgave them.” But I had to forgive For -Real, this time. Not for them but for Me. Don’t allow anyone to have that much Power/Influence over your Emotions/Life.
Secondly, I wanted to see them through the eyes of God. And here’s what I saw: Hurt people hurt. Confused people cause confusion. And hateful people hate on others. All I can do is pray for them and love them from afar…I’m still a work in progress, so I don’t need them in my presence. (#Truth) But if they honestly needed me/my help, I would still be there, with eyes wide open, this time.
Next, I wanted to let all the Faux Friends out there know how much they inspire me and make me want to be a Better person. I’m being so for-real and genuine right now….
– You inspire me to continue to Love Hard, but more cautiously. Loving the Right person is essential.
– You inspire me to be a better friend. To check to see if my motives, actions and words are sincere and if the tables were turned, would I appreciate what I’m displaying?
– You inspire me to be the Best Me I can be. To always work on my flaws and weaknesses, because I can’t change No One but Me. To continue to better myself in all facet of life: Mentally, Physically, Spiritually, Socially, Emotionally, Financially and also take the Higher Road in difficult situations.
Lastly, Thank You!! At the end of the day, you have assisted in making me Stronger, Wiser and Better.
To all my readers, I hope you can take something Positive away from my situation.
Until the next time stay, “Beautiful, Sassy, and Sophisticated”!!
Shemmyla Green aka Ms. Sophisticated